I have found over the years I have worked with a lot of people and often they live their lives backwards. Everyone wants to have more money; more stuff so they can then do more of what they want so that they will then be able to live their lives so much HAPPIER.
After having a near death experience myself I know that life is fragile and learning to be mindful and enjoy happiness even in doing the smallest of daily tasks is truly living. Not waiting until something major happens to you so then you can change the way you are living your life.
I often think of our lives as containing three levels which are:
Beingness, Doingness and Havingness.
Is really the foundation of being here on mother earth, living, being conscious and being alive. The experience we all have when we are being totally complete and at rest within ourselves.
Is the activity and movement we do during our day and stems from the natural and creative energy that flows freely through every living thing and is really the core and source of our vitality and our life.
Is the state of being with all your relationships with other people and everything in the universe. The ability to really accept people and things in our lives and to be comfortable to be in the same space with them.
In the spur of the moment my beautiful daughter and I decided to jump in the car and do a roadie to Maungatapere a beautiful slice of paradise in New Zealand which is located about 8 minutes before Whangarei city. A roadie to catch up with family living their dream on their avocado orchard. As we drove up we laughed and sang old songs, taking in all the beautiful sights as we passed making jokes and enjoying being in the moment together. There is nothing like being locked in a car together for two hours to really connect again on all sorts of levels RIGHT!
I have found when you escape your everyday routines magic starts to happen in so many areas of your life. And the best escapes are those ones where you decide in a heartbeat and go, no overthinking about what you are leaving behind only going and moving forward to discovering new experiences, new connections, new possibilities. Even more special is the times you escape to spend with family as in life as we grow older I think we all realise that our families are so precious to us. Friends can come and go and many come into our life for a reason and a season but family is always there through the tough times and the happy times supporting us and loving us unconditionally. Spending time with people you love brings so much happiness creating lifelong memories which you will always have nestled within your heart.
That night we spent all together reminiscing about times gone by and one of those times was the day my brother had his brain aneurysm. As I sat beside him and listened to him retell his story of that day I felt so caught up in the moment feeling warm from the glow of the fire he had lit. He said he was talking with a guy in town and out of the blue felt a stabbing pain in his head and got back into his car and drove the 8 minutes back to home. He suffered another sharper pain and took a couple of Panadol and went to bed telling his partner he needed to sleep it off. Waking up he found he was sweating and feeling really unwell. THANK GOD his partner took action and called an ambulance which arrived in a few minutes and after doing some checks took him straight to the emergency rescue helicopter where he was airlifted to hospital saying he had suffered a bleed on the brain.
Before having surgery to stop the bleed I remember we were all told there may be many major side effects which could lead to a stroke and even death. It felt like hours of waiting for us before knowing he was OK. Even then after surgery he was not out of the woods as the next five days after are so critical to surviving. As I listened he said he didn’t remember anything from that time and felt as though he had lost 15 days of his life during his hospital stay. He has been through a lot in his life and he shared with me after that experience he came to realise how precious life is and how vulnerable we all are and he is so truly grateful every day he wakes up and is able to live where he does and enjoy the simple pleasures of daily life with his wonderful family.
My brother gave up a life of chasing the eternal dollar, working 24/7 and the stress of everyday life after he had a life changing event happen. Do you need to wait until that happens to you? Think about your life right here and now and be grateful and accept all you have achieved and where you are now. Be gentle on yourself and stop listening to your ego which constantly tells you that you are not good enough and should be doing more. Start learning mindfulness and keep growing yourself as a person forgiving and loving everyone you connect with as I know life is too short for anything else.
Something he shared with me which he finds really helps him to relax if he is feeling tense and I do this too, is learning the art of full breathing and understanding that it is virtually a necessity for high level health and well being. Most of us only breathe with the top part of our body which is restricted breathing and this has been found to be linked to anxiety, worry and depression.
Here is a simple breathing technique which you can do in 3 minutes:
Rest your hands on your sides just above the waist and close your eyes and breathe out completely.
Inhale gently through your nose letting your abdomen swell to the count of five,
Continue to breathe in through your nose to another count of five this time letting your ribs expand under your hands.
Hold your breath for the count of five then let it out through your mouth as you count slowly to ten.
Notice how your rib cage shrinks beneath your hands as you release all the air.
Repeat 4 times